Women's Rugby Football Club Clara Porter

By Ashley Arana, Arts and Living Editor, Issue 24, 04/20/2005

What's your major and why do you like it?

Classics. I like Ancient Greek and Latin. I enjoy learning words and noting their eventual English derivations. The department here is also excellent.

What are your career plans?

Possibly teaching at a high school level, perhaps being a lawyer. If delusions came true, I'd suddenly either come into a ridiculous sum of money or learn to be content with resigning myself to a life of poverty, and travel until the end of time.

I hear you're on the rugby team. Do you have any good team stories or game moments?

Rugby is a lot of fun. Gimping around during the season and racking up battle scars and bruises has its strange appeal. The game is initially contrary to instinct, but making a good tackle or a smart play or having a breakaway is so satisfying. The team is pretty "special" and our off-field shenanigans are probably not suitable to mention in this publication. A memorable game moment is when one of our players clotheslined another girl-as amusing as it was illegal.

Can you tell me about your room? I hear it's interesting.

My room is very puerile and colorful. I have a shameful amount of plastic crap-bats, balls, a mini-golf bag, a giant alarm clock, a giant coke bottle, K'NEX toy models, giant sunglasses, chili pepper lights, etc. I have a poster of Dash from "The Incredibles," a picture of Curious George, a left-handed drawing of my imitation of an art project my freshman year roommates had, a dinosaur piñata adorned with a sparkly purple party hat and shiny patriotic pinwheel, a giant pencil, a wooden hand, Play-Doh, my top desk drawer is FULL of art supplies, like those you'd find in a kindergarten classroom, a magnet board dedicated to my dislike of [President George W.] Bush, rubber duckies, a large ceramic fish with a gold plastic bejeweled tiara on its tail, little wooden Indian gods, a Russian doll, a cannibal doll, an afro wig, a giant bow, a Magic 8 Ball, a huge hat, all of my clothing and shoes are stored in color order. Essentially, anything plastic or with a bright hue is a must-have for my room-or already in it.

What's your favorite kind of music?

I like most music genres. I love jazz and any song with traces of sadness. Currently, my two favorite songs are "Respiration" by Black Star and "Warm and Sunny Days" by The Dears.

Do you have any special hidden talents?

I can fit five quarters in my belly button.

What's your least favorite thing about Amherst and why?

VALS. The food is repugnant. I have eaten there only 25 times this semester. (I literally keep a tally.) How food can simultaneously be over and under cooked absolutely stupefies me. The selection is repetitive and severely lacking, and their "ethnic" dishes are an insult to whatever culture they supposedly hail from. I can't even stand the salad dressing.

Any good memories from freshman year or advice for freshmen?

Umm, freshman year was a whirlwind of good times. One of my favorites was returning to Stearns from Marsh completely sober, the entire way shouting, singing wildly and beating plastic water bottles all over everything, recreating "Stomp!" every three feet. This ridiculousness somehow turned into a two-plus hour ordeal. Advice to freshmen-get involved with an activity that you really enjoy. It's nice to have an outlet outside of schoolwork.

What would be your ideal date?

I'm not sure. Some random activity or two, food at some point, good conversation, laughter, ending with a feeling of hope of what may come.

What's the most embarrassing thing that's ever happened to you?

There are really too many incidents to recall or have recalled for me. Let's just say freshman and sophomore year my floors had something called "The Stupid List," and I was always the "winner."