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After many nights of intense focus, you build a home underground. It is [[cozy|yearning]].
You come to your senses.\n\nIt is so easy to lose ourselves in our worst habits.\n\nLet's try harder next time.\n\nYou return to your hermit's dwelling, slowly, [[lost in thought|spider encounter]].
YOU ARE A <<if $spidergrow eq 0>>GIANT SPIDER<<endif>><<if $spidergrow eq 1>>FEARSOME GIANT SPIDER<<endif>><<if $spidergrow eq 2>>TERRIFYINGLY GIGANTIC SPIDER<<endif>>\n\n<<if $spidergrow gte 2>>YOU DON'T FIND ANYTHING. YOU HAVE BIG AMBITIONS AND THEY CAN'T BE FULFILLED IN THIS DESERT.<<else>>\nYOU FIND A BEETLE. A LITTLE SNACK. YOU EAT IT.\n<<silently>>\n<<set $spiderhunt = $spiderhunt + 1>>\n<<endsilently>>\n<<endif>>\n\n[[HUNT|SPIDERHUNT]]\n
IT TASTES GOOD! \n\n\n\nthe gods are shocked. What [[strange beast|strange beast]] have you become??
<<silently>>\n<<set $dignumber = $dignumber + 1>>\n<<endsilently>>\nbum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum\n\nyou [[dig|digging up]] [[dig|digging down]] [[dig|digging sideways]] the whole day through
A shadow covers you, and the spider's fangs descend like a falling knife. They pierce your heart, and you die slowly.\n\nThe spider pauses to reflect on what your life meant.\n\n[[END|thanks for playing]]
<<silently>>\n<<set $dignumber = 0>>\n<<set $hermitnumber = 0>>\n<<endsilently>>\nyou are an ant.\n\n[[dig|too hard]]\n[[travel|traveling]]\n
you're an ant, what is "hunt"?\n\n[[smell|sweet odor]]\n[[dig|soft ground]]\n
YOU ARE A TERRIFYINGLY GIGANTIC SPIDER\n\nBEATS BEING AN ANT\n\n[[CONTINUE|GENERAL]]\n
you have 6 legs. \n\nfirst you move one leg\nthen another\nthen another\nthen another\nthen another\nthen another\n\nyou are someplace different now. the ground is different. also the air is different too\n\n[[dig|soft ground]]\n[[how is the air different?|sweet odor]]\n[[hunt|nothing to hunt]]
Over the years, the two of you have eaten healthily, and your bodies have grown and grown. Your skin has become soft and tufted with hair, and your thoraxes have widened. If you knew what a human looked like, you might compare yourself favorably to one -- about the same body mass and intelligence, but a human lacks your attractive antennae, mandibles, and lovely 5th and 6th legs.\n\nOne evening, as the campfire dies, your grandson asks you if you think you have lived a good life.\n\n[[continue|stock]]\n
<<silently>>\n<<set $dignumber = $dignumber - 4>>\n<<endsilently>>\ntrough trough trough trough trough <<print $dignumber>>\n\n<<if $dignumber eq 7>>you find a [[strange berry|eat berry]] in the dirt. you feel nostalgic for home. [[keep digging?|digging down]]<<endif>>\n<<if $dignumber gte 12>>you are becoming tired of digging?\n[[raise a family|ant family]]\n[[no keep diggin|digging sideways]]<<endif>>\n<<if $dignumber lte -7>>you are becoming tired of digging?\n[[become a hermit|hermit]]\n[[no keep diggin|digging down]]<<endif>>\n<<if $dignumber gt -7 and $dignumber lt 12 and $dignumber neq 7>>you [[dig|digging up]] [[dig|digging down]] [[dig|digging sideways]] the whole day through<<endif>>
<<silently>>\n<<set $companion = "yes">>\n<<endsilently>>\nThe soft moonlight shines down on the two of you as you walk in the park, hand in hand, sharing secrets and smiles.\n\n\n\n\n\n<<if $lover eq "no" and $friend eq "no">>I wish I had a [[lover|lover]]/[[friend|friend]]<<endif>>\n<<if $friend eq "no" and $lover eq "yes">>I wish I had a [[friend|friend]]<<endif>>\n<<if $friend eq "yes" and $lover eq "no">>I wish I had a [[lover|lover]]<<endif>>\n<<if $friend eq "yes" and $lover eq "yes">>[[take stock of your life|stock]]<<endif>>
You stand motionless, but your thoughts race. \n\nHas the spider seen you?\nWill it pass you by?\nOr are you already dead?\n\nYou can sense it getting closer.\n\nThe smell of autumn leaves in the air.\n\nYou remember your [[childhood|memory]].
One day you are sitting by yourself at your favorite cliff and a young ant comes by. You can tell by the way that he walks and carries himself that wants life advice. The way his antennae swing uncertainly as he travels is particularly revealing to an ant of your perspicacity, and you feel that he is a kindred spirit.\n\n[[tell him what you know|mentor]]\n[[tell him lies|evil]]\n[[hide|introvert]]\n
You find yourself scurrying\n\noneleg oneleg oneleg oneleg oneleg oneleg oneleg\n\nand pouncing onto the strange ant, who is surprised and [[overwhelmed|winner]]
The spider has already seen you. It's been watching you your whole life.\n\nYou are crushed beneath its hairy leg, and devoured on the spot.\n\nThe spider travels on, looking for more prey.\n\nAnd you discover that, at least for ants, there is a life after death. But that's a tale for another time.\n\n[[END|thanks for playing]]
Soon your life comes to an end. You welcome it with dignity, as much dignity as an ant can have.\n\n[[END|thanks for playing]]
your aging body is spry and tough, and you feel no pain. your sharp-spiked feet strike blows against the young ant's quailing body, and you manage to [[sever|bisect]] his abdomen from his upper parts. \n\n
YOU ARE A TERRIFYINGLY GIGANTIC SPIDER.\n\nYOU EAT A DEVOUT CATHOLIC ON HER WAY BACK FROM CHURCH\n\nGOOD THING SHE JUST CONFESSED\n\n[[STILL HUNGRY?|NATIONALGUARD]]\n\n
YOU ARE A TERRIFYINGLY GIGANTIC SPIDER.\n\nYOU USE YOUR WEBS AND POISONOUS FANGS TO DEVESTATING EFFECT IN YOUR FIGHT AGAINST DOMESTIC TERRORISM. \n\nYOU ARE THE BEST GENERAL OF THE NATIONAL GUARD.\n\nYOU FIND HAPPINESS AND FULFILLMENT IN YOUR WORK.\n\nEVERYONE IS SCARED OF YOU.\n\n[[CONTEMPLATE|FUCKEM]]\n
[[END|thanks for playing]]\n
YOU ARE A <<if $spidergrow eq 0>>GIANT SPIDER<<endif>><<if $spidergrow eq 1>>FEARSOME GIANT SPIDER<<endif>><<if $spidergrow eq 2>>TERRIFYINGLY GIGANTIC SPIDER<<endif>>\n\n<<if $spidergrow gte 1>>YOU FIND A SCORPION'S NEST. YOU KILL THE SCORPION AND EAT IT. DELICIOUS. \n<<silently>>\n<<set $spiderhunt = $spiderhunt + 5>>\n<<endsilently>>\n<<else>>YOU FIND AN ANT. A LITTLE SNACK. ALMOST TOO LITTLE TO BOTHER WITH BUT WHATEVER.<<endif>>\n<<silently>>\n<<set $spiderhunt = $spiderhunt + 2>>\n<<endsilently>>\n\n[[HUNT|SPIDERHUNT]]\n\n\n\n \n\n
the ground here is too hard to dig\n\n[[travel|traveling]]\n[[contemplate|contemplate]]\n
The young ant's vitality and enthusiasm frightens you. You scurry, unnoticed, behind a local boulder and watch as he passes by.\n\nAre you [[envious?|surge]]\nOr [[cautious|wait]]
A vast squirming community of larvae, glistening in goo, just birthed from the queen-mother. Surrounded by a million other beings exactly like yourself, you tumbled in the heap, sliding slickly between bodies.\n\nYou feel as though you are still there, just hours after your emergence, dreaming of this moment. You know that it will happen.\n\n//What will happen?//\n\n[[Death from above.|fangs]]
Insectopia
<<silently>>\n<<set $dignumber = $dignumber + 3>>\n<<endsilently>>\nbum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum <<print $dignumber>>\n\n<<if $dignumber eq 7>>you find a [[strange berry|eat berry]] in the dirt. you feel nostalgic for home. [[keep digging?|digging down]]<<endif>>\n<<if $dignumber gte 12>>you are becoming tired of digging?\n[[raise a family|ant family]]\n[[no keep diggin|digging sideways]]<<endif>>\n<<if $dignumber lte -7>>you are becoming tired of digging?\n[[become a hermit|hermit]]\n[[no keep diggin|digging down]]<<endif>>\n<<if $dignumber gt -7 and $dignumber lt 12 and $dignumber neq 7>>you [[dig|digging up]] [[dig|digging down]] [[dig|digging sideways]] the whole day through<<endif>>
Guilty thoughts driven out of your mind, you scurry quickly towards a crevice between two nearby boulders. You run over 13 times your body length in a single second! Nerves blaze, the smell of charred wood in the air.\n\nYou [[fling|not fast enough]] your body forwards.
YOU ARE A TERRIFYINGLY GIGANTIC SPIDER.\n\nYOU EAT THE MAYOR\n\nHE WAS JUST ABOUT TO SQUASH THE PLANS FOR A CORRUPT CASINO TO BE BUILT IN HIS CITY, WHERE HE GREW UP IN AND LOVES VERY MUCH\n\nYOU EAT THE CASINO PLANNING COMMISIONER TOO\n\nNEVERTHELESS, THE QUALITY OF LIFE IN THE CITY HAS DECREASED SINCE YOU ARRIVED\n\n[[STILL HUNGRY?|NATIONALGUARD]]
<<silently>>\n<<set $dignumber = $dignumber + 2>>\n<<endsilently>>\ntum de tum, tum de tum <<print $dignumber>>\n\n<<if $dignumber eq 7>>you find a [[strange berry|eat berry]] in the dirt. you feel nostalgic for home. [[keep digging?|digging down]]<<endif>>\n<<if $dignumber gte 12>>you are becoming tired of digging?\n[[raise a family|ant family]]\n[[no keep diggin|digging sideways]]<<endif>>\n<<if $dignumber lte -7>>you are becoming tired of digging?\n[[become a hermit|hermit]]\n[[no keep diggin|digging down]]<<endif>>\n<<if $dignumber gt -7 and $dignumber lt 12 and $dignumber neq 7>>you [[dig|digging up]] [[dig|digging down]] [[dig|digging sideways]] the whole day through<<endif>>
no digging for this ant. you decide to become a hermit. you live alone and watch and wait as time passes by. you [[age|time]]
<<silently>>\n<<set $friend = "yes">>\n<<endsilently>>\nYou go to the coffeeshop each day by yourself, until your favorite drink is well known to each employee. One of the baristas asks if you'd like to come to a party she's throwing, and after that the two of you are inseparable.\n\n\n\n\n\n<<if $lover eq "no" and $companion eq "no">>I wish I had a [[lover|lover]]/[[companion|companion]]<<endif>>\n<<if $companion eq "no" and $lover eq "yes">>I wish I had a [[companion|companion]]<<endif>>\n<<if $companion eq "yes" and $lover eq "no">>I wish I had a [[lover|lover]]<<endif>>\n<<if $companion eq "yes" and $lover eq "yes">>[[take stock of your life|stock]]<<endif>>
Thank you for playing. \n\n<3 Phil\n\n[[You could start over, but what is there to be gained? We live by our actions.|Start]]\n\n[[Go somewhere new|http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QolGoGwi77U&list=LLIYtNn_gAsCpOJqvEVXy0qg]]\n
YOU ARE A TERRIFYINGLY GIGANTIC SPIDER.\n\nYOU APPROACH THE HUMAN CITY. YOU SMELL FEAR IN THE AIR.\n\nLITTLE HUMANS SCREAM BEFORE YOU.\n\n[[CRUNCH|MAYOR]] [[CRUNCH|CHURCHGOER]]\n\nYOU EAT THEM UP\n\n[[STILL HUNGRY?|NATIONALGUARD]]
After many nights spent tending to your nest, you start to dream of having [[company.|ant family]]
As you near your dwelling, you are wracked with guilt over what you've done. \n\nA giant spider approaches.\n\n[[Flee!|panic]]\n[[Stay still|toolate]]\n\n\n
<<silently>>\n<<set $dignumber = 1>>\n<<endsilently>>\nthe ground here is so so soft\n\nthere are lots of small pebbles and bits of brown crud that you push through\n\nsoon you are inside the ground\n\n[[dig|keep digging]]\n[[rest|rest]]\n
[[time passes|grow old]]
<<silently>>\n<<set $friend = "yes">>\n<<endsilently>>\nYou meet a friend who pushes you to try harder in life and in personal fitness. Even when you don't think you deserve the best, reach for it anyways. That's what he does.\n\n\n\n\n<<if $lover eq "no" and $companion eq "no">>I wish I had a [[lover|lover]]/[[companion|companion]]<<endif>>\n<<if $companion eq "no" and $lover eq "yes">>I wish I had a [[companion|companion]]<<endif>>\n<<if $companion eq "yes" and $lover eq "no">>I wish I had a [[lover|lover]]<<endif>>\n<<if $companion eq "yes" and $lover eq "yes">>[[take stock of your life|stock]]<<endif>>
YOU ARE A GIANT SPIDER\n<<silently>>\n<<set $spiderhunt = 0>>\n<<set $spidergrow = 0>>\n<<set $metahint = "no">>\n<<endsilently>>\n\n[[HUNT|SPIDERHUNT]]\n
"Digging is what all ants must do. It is only by digging that you will find your nature. You are foolish to be searching above the ground. You are liable to get stepped on."\n\nThe young ant hears you and passes on.\n\n[[Time Passes|death]]\n
How will you meet?\n\n[[Under the moon|moon]]\n[[Over decadent cocktails|cocktails]]\n[[Caught in a moment together|moment]]\n
<<if ($hermitnumber eq 1) or ($hermitnumber eq 2)>> so strange for an ant to think. who are you?\n\nbetter [[find a spot|traveling]] to [[dig|too hard]]<<endif>>\n<<if $hermitnumber eq 3>> you are a [[strange ant|hermit]] who does not like digging<<endif>>\n<<if ($hermitnumber gte 4) or ($hermitnumber) lt 1>>hard to think when you're an ant.\n\nbetter [[find a spot|traveling]] to [[dig|too hard]]<<endif>>\n<<set $hermitnumber = $hermitnumber + 1>>\n
YOU ARE A <<if $spidergrow eq 0>>GIANT SPIDER<<endif>><<if $spidergrow eq 1>>FEARSOME GIANT SPIDER<<endif>><<if $spidergrow eq 2>>TERRIFYINGLY GIGANTIC SPIDER<<endif>>\n\n[[FOLLOW THE SUN|SUN]]\n[[FOLLOW VIBRATIONS|VIBRATIONS]]\n[[METABOLIZE|GROW]]\n\n\n\n\n<<if $spidergrow eq 2>>[[TERRORIZE THE POPULACE|GODZILLA]]<<endif>>\n\n\n
You investigate the berry with your mandibles. Its skin is delicate and ruptures at the slightest touch. You are bathed in fragrant juices. A sweet antiseptic smell surrounds you. \n\nThe ground is [[constraining|strange beast]]\n
your body ruptures, and undergoes a change\n\nflesh expands\neyes pop\nslender thorax pounds into head\nlegs sprout and grow hair\n\nearth rumbles and shakes\n\nyou are [[hungry|giant spider]]\n
you're an ant! you don't get tired! laaaammmmeee\n\n[[dig|keep digging]]\n
YOU ARE A TERRIFYINGLY GIGANTIC SPIDER.\n\nTHE NATIONAL GUARD ARRIVES\n\n[[YOU EAT THEM TOO|LAW]]\n
<<silently>>\n<<set $friend = "yes">>\n<<endsilently>>\nAt the vegetable market, you are asked if you would like to volunteer to pick peaches next weekend by one of the produce-sellers. You say "sure", have a blast, and by the end of a month the two of you have agreed to start a band.\n\n\n\n\n\n\n<<if $lover eq "no" and $companion eq "no">>I wish I had a [[lover|lover]]/[[companion|companion]]<<endif>>\n<<if $companion eq "no" and $lover eq "yes">>I wish I had a [[companion|companion]]<<endif>>\n<<if $companion eq "yes" and $lover eq "no">>I wish I had a [[lover|lover]]<<endif>>\n<<if $companion eq "yes" and $lover eq "yes">>[[take stock of your life|stock]]<<endif>>
Where will you go?\n\n[[To the gym|gym]]\n[[To the coffeeshop|coffeeshop]]\n[[To the vegetable market|market]]\n
YOU ARE A <<if $spidergrow eq 0>>GIANT SPIDER<<endif>><<if $spidergrow eq 1>>FEARSOME GIANT SPIDER<<endif>><<if $spidergrow eq 2>>TERRIFYINGLY GIGANTIC SPIDER<<endif>>\n\n<<if $spidergrow eq 2>>CAN'T GROW ANY MORE. NEED BIG FOOD.<<endif>>\n<<if ($spiderhunt gte 15) and ($spidergrow eq 1)>>YOU DIGEST YOUR FOOD. IT GIVES YOU GREAT POWER. YOUR HAIR BRISTLES MIGHTILLY AND YOUR BODY SPASMS AS YOU DOUBLE IN SIZE, THEN DOUBLE AGAIN! YOU ARE FEARSOME AND DEADLY, AND TERRIFYING.<<set $spidergrow = 2>><<endif>>\n<<if ($spiderhunt lt 15) and ($spidergrow eq 1)>>SO HUNGRY<<endif>>\n<<if ($spiderhunt gte 4) and ($spidergrow eq 0)>>YOU DIGEST YOUR FOOD. IT GIVES YOU GREAT POWER. YOUR HAIR BRISTLES MIGHTILLY AND YOUR BODY SPASMS AS YOU DOUBLE IN SIZE. YOU ARE FEARSOME.<<set $spidergrow = 1>><<endif>>\n<<if ($spiderhunt lt 4) and ($spidergrow eq 0)>>SO HUNGRY<<endif>>\n\n\n\n[[HUNT|SPIDERHUNT]]\n
The young ant passes on. \n\nAfter he passes, you step out into to open to watch his form fade into the distance. \n\nYou have an urge to [[dig|dig anew]].
a smell like a song calls to you from below the ground. you must [[dig|soft ground]] to find it, your true nature.
<<silently>>\n<<set $companion = "yes">>\n<<endsilently>>\nFeeling heady at the discovery of new delicious flavors in your favorite drink, you agree to walk her home. You spend the night at her place, and stay late into the afternoon. Five years later, the two of you re-enact that night, for old times' sake. \n\n\n\n\n\n\n<<if $lover eq "no" and $friend eq "no">>I wish I had a [[lover|lover]]/[[friend|friend]]<<endif>>\n<<if $friend eq "no" and $lover eq "yes">>I wish I had a [[friend|friend]]<<endif>>\n<<if $friend eq "yes" and $lover eq "no">>I wish I had a [[lover|lover]]<<endif>>\n<<if $friend eq "yes" and $lover eq "yes">>[[take stock of your life|stock]]<<endif>>
You abandon your digging efforts and look for love and companionship instead.\n<<silently>>\n<<set $lover = "no">>\n<<set $friend = "no">>\n<<set $companion = "no">>\n<<endsilently>>\n\nI wish I had a [[lover|lover]]/[[friend|friend]]/[[companion|companion]].
<<silently>>\n<<set $lover = "yes">>\n<<endsilently>>\nYou catch the attention of a young secretary who becomes besotted by your devotion to finding the best things in life. You spend long nights dancing in clubs and rubbing closely, your thoraxes entwining as the subsonic bass beats. \n\n\n\n\n\n\n<<if $friend eq "no" and $companion eq "no">>I wish I had a [[friend|friend]]/[[companion|companion]]<<endif>>\n<<if $companion eq "no" and $friend eq "yes">>I wish I had a [[companion|companion]]<<endif>>\n<<if $companion eq "yes" and $friend eq "no">>I wish I had a [[friend|friend]]<<endif>>\n<<if $companion eq "yes" and $friend eq "yes">>[[take stock of your life|stock]]<<endif>>
YOU ARE A TERRIFYINGLY GIGANTIC SPIDER\n\nYOU THINK LONG AND HARD AND DECIDE YOU'RE HAPPY BEING YOURSELF\n\n[[FUCK HATERS|FUCK HATERS]]\n\n\n
two halves of an ant lie some distance apart on the dusty ground in front of you. What do you do?\n\n[[regret|regret]]\n\nor \n\n[[DEVOUR|new nature]]\n
<<silently>>\n<<set $lover = "yes">>\n<<endsilently>>\nYou catch the eye of a bewitching scarlet rogue. She shows you sensations you've never felt before. Your six legs tingle ache after she finishes with you, and the feeling lasts for days.\n\n\n\n\n\n<<if $friend eq "no" and $companion eq "no">>I wish I had a [[friend|friend]]/[[companion|companion]]<<endif>>\n<<if $companion eq "no" and $friend eq "yes">>I wish I had a [[companion|companion]]<<endif>>\n<<if $companion eq "yes" and $friend eq "no">>I wish I had a [[friend|friend]]<<endif>>\n<<if $companion eq "yes" and $friend eq "yes">>[[take stock of your life|stock]]<<endif>>
<<silently>>\n<<set $companion = "yes">>\n<<endsilently>>\nOn your wedding day, you wonder what your life might have been like had you not had the impulse to look back at the stranger on the street, only to find him staring back at you, eyes deep and sad. You see the face of your mother in the assembled crowd and smile. \n\n\n\n\n\n<<if $lover eq "no" and $friend eq "no">>I wish I had a [[lover|lover]]/[[friend|friend]]<<endif>>\n<<if $friend eq "no" and $lover eq "yes">>I wish I had a [[friend|friend]]<<endif>>\n<<if $friend eq "yes" and $lover eq "no">>I wish I had a [[lover|lover]]<<endif>>\n<<if $friend eq "yes" and $lover eq "yes">>[[take stock of your life|stock]]<<endif>>
<<silently>>\n<<set $lover = "yes">>\n<<endsilently>>\nYou nestle quietly into the embrace of a warm bookish fellow, who cares for you tenderly for a month before the wind sweeps you away from him. You forget him quickly, your brains focusing on more immediate matters — but he remembers you.\n\n\n\n\n\n<<if $friend eq "no" and $companion eq "no">>I wish I had a [[friend|friend]]/[[companion|companion]]<<endif>>\n<<if $companion eq "no" and $friend eq "yes">>I wish I had a [[companion|companion]]<<endif>>\n<<if $companion eq "yes" and $friend eq "no">>I wish I had a [[friend|friend]]<<endif>>\n<<if $companion eq "yes" and $friend eq "yes">>[[take stock of your life|stock]]<<endif>>\n
A surge of jealousy and rage! The smell of citrus in your brain.\n\n[[approach the strange ant|pounce]]\n[[be cautious|wait]]\n
The young ant when you first meet him is impetuous and sometimes unkind. Time and your company change him, however, and he learns to temper his youthful energy with forethought and empathy. \n\nThe two of you work together to build a [[home|home]] in the long sands of the desert.\n\n
From whence this urge, you're not sure. But the ground is soft and [[yielding|home underground]] to your touch.
You take him under your (figurative) wing and teach him what you know about life. How to tell the time of day by the shadows across the ground. How to tell if something can be safely lifted without injuring yourself. How to entertain yourself when you are alone. \n\nHe calls you [[Grandad|mentorend]]\n
What will you wear?\n\n[[the gold tiara|tiara]]\n[[the dark turtleneck|turtleneck]]\n[[the tasteful blazer|blazer]]\n
Phil Dupont
You reflect. Overall, you think it's been good. You are happy with the decisions you've made. In fact, you couldn't imagine it happening [[any other way|thanks]].\n\n\n
BY THE LAW OF THE LAND, YOU BECOME THE NEW GENERAL OF THE NATIONAL GUARD\n\n\n\n[[CONTINUE|GENERAL]]\n\n[[THIS IS GETTING SILLY|SILLY]]\n\n\n
[[End|thanks for playing]]